91-Year-Old Gives Birth...
Look at who showed up at my door today…
“Thank you, guys. That was wonderful. I’d invite you in for some Happy Birthday Cheer, but I just shampooed my carpet.”
Yahoo! Beyond all expectations, I am having another birthday, my 91st.
“So, Sally-Jane, how did you start your day?”
I’m glad you asked.
While I am still in bed, I check my pulse, which gives me the most important information… I’m alive. I follow this by kissing my bedside mezuzah, then I say a few hail Marys, making the sign of the cross, bow to the Buddha on my night table, light a Kwanzaa candle, and recite the Serenity Prayer. At this point, I make preparations to move from my supine position, ever so slowly, to a sitting position on the edge of my bed. Eventually, as my headball clears and various bones come together, I am ready to do my interpretation of the homo-erectus position of our species. And as I did, look who showed up at my door!
Today is even more special than just being 91 years of age. After a lifetime of trying to have it all and failing and succeeding in brilliant proportions, my memoir, Not Yet! is officially published today.
“So Sally-Jane, what does that feel like?
What does it feel like? Well…
It feels like I have just given birth.
And I want to tell you that at 91 years of age, I am relieved I only birthed my story and not another baby.
Although, if I think about it, if I really did give birth to a human being baby, then I would change the subtitle of the book from: Tales from a 90-year-old Broadway Diva You Should Have Known…to… Broadway Diva Gives Birth at 91 Just In Time to Be Famous Before She Dies.
Ever since I completed the book and just recently recorded the audiobook edition of my memoir, I find I am automatically showing up at my computer without a continuing story to… to… you know… continue.
It’s all so Talmudic.
On the one hand, I wanted to finish the saga before I was finished, but now that it is finished, I feel a little bereft, empty.
In time, that should pass because in this headball of mine, I am already onto the next book of chapters. From… Not Yet! to Now What?
In the meantime, today, I am going to spruce up this old lady by doing the beauty salon tango of hair and nails. I can’t get enough of people exclaiming…
“No! You can’t be 91. I just don’t believe it. Myrna, take a look at this lady. Does she look 91 to you?”
Don’t get me wrong. I love being 91. I just don’t particularly care for what my mirror sees, and my body feels. I am not, do you hear me? I am not complaining. I’d be a doofus if I did. I am so damned grateful and so fortunate to be able to share with all of you just how damned grateful and fortunate I am… right??? Of course, right!!!
Love, Sally-Jane
P.S. I have many traditions. My favorite is giving a gift to my nearest and dearest on my birthday. Herein is Chapter 5, My Dossier… Happy Birthday, one and all.
P.P.S. If you are interested in some more chapters… here’s how you can buy the book, available in e-book and paperback. Audiobook coming soon! If you like it, please write a review! If you don’t, then we need to taawk!
Bookshop.org (supports your local bookstore!)
Amazon.com (ebook and print)
Request it from your local bookstore.
OR… you could wait until the movie comes out. However, you might have to wait a long time. We are still fighting over who plays me as a young girl. I am of the opinion that with good lighting and camera angles and a brilliant plastic surgeon, I could pull it off. A girl can dream, can’t she?
Happy Birthday!! from another Libra who turned 82 on October 2nd! We know how to live and be resilient, even in the face of aging. I prefer aging to the alternative and, guess what, I know we all start aging in the womb and it's a continuous process, evidently one you have mastered magnificently. I look forward to reading more of your stories.
Happy Birthday! I've read your book. I love your book! Have a wonderful day.